The Hat that would not be Knit

Keep guessing on Jared’s sock symbol… nobody’s guessed it yet.

Jared’s socks were one of a dozen things I could have been doing yesterday afternoon. I could have been cleaning one of the three narsty fleeces still taking up my floorspace, or spinning some more green Romney, or packing for our weekend away for goodness’ sake. Instead I sat on my arse and argued with a hat.

Remember this yarn?

I cast on an earflap hat with some Tahki/Stacy Charles Montana back in May, and the project has sat on my dresser pretty much exactly as it appears above for two and a half months. The thing is, the pattern really wasn’t working for me. I hate to speak ill of another designer’s work, but the fact is, when you just snag a free pattern from Ravelry, you never know what you’re going to get.

Every night I would go to bed and meditate on this hat, at least for three seconds before forgetting about it again. I’d come up with a few ideas, and finally settled on a plan that I thought was very clever, and which a couple nights ago, I attempted to execute.

The Yarn Harlot designed the Unoriginal Hat: small and relatively simple hat that could be cranked out in a few hours.

Of course, I had to convalute this about fifteen ways. See if you can follow this train of thought: “I love those big cables, but I still really want an earflap hat. If I converted the hat to top-down, I could continue two of the big cables onto earflaps, and that’d look pretty sweet. Oh, but the hat has four repeats around, and that would put the cables in the wrong position, so I’ll change the chart so I can just do three pattern repeats. Sure, that makes sense.” So before I know it, I’ve done a figure-8 cast on and am increasing somewhat randomly to reach the number of stitches I think I need to use the top of a chart I am knitting upside-down and that I’ve changed without writing anything down.

You know I like to keep things simple.

It was annoying, but I pulled it off, and was rather proud of myself. I made the hat way too long at first, and since I’m not really into the beehive-head look, I ripped out three inches and redid the earflaps. I succeeded in making the hat fit my head,  with the big cables continuing down the ears, and even came up with a pleasing point to the earflaps… but once it was done, I had a problem.

I failed to realize that positioning two of the large cables over my ears (which are on the back 1/3s of your head, if you didn’t know) would leave the third large cable squarely in the middle of my forehead. I put it on and my husband says “It looks like an old-style football helmet.”

Waah! Do not want!

Matt submits that a pom pom would improve the look considerably:

So what should I do? Find another pattern and try again? Throw on a couple of braids and a giant pom pom and hope it gets cuter? Or should I just accept, as Jared followed up, “It’s a bulky earflap hat. No one’s going to take you seriously anyway.”

4 thoughts on “The Hat that would not be Knit

  1. I think it needs an edging to give it a finished off look and take your eye around the hat…..thereby less focus on the front. Then add the big pom pom. We rarely look at each other front on anyway… looks great!


  2. Edging. The pom pom is not my favorite way to go with anything! Mom seems to be right on about the edging and the fact that we rarely look at the front.


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