Last night, I was ready to end my knitting career. Last night, I was ready to impale myself on my needles. Last night was one of those nights that all of us knitters have, when we forget all the reasons that we try to change the world with string and sticks and seriously consider garrotting ourselves with a longish set of circulars.
I won’t tell you what the project was, as (oh dear God) I might be redoing it, but I can give you a general idea of what happened. I was really enjoying this project. It had clever little mitered corners that kept me entertained, while consisting mainly of a very simple stitch. The yarn was slubby and variegated and (most loveably) discontinued, and I enjoyed it mightily. It was nice to finally be working on a Christmas present that I was getting a kick out of, rather than kicking myself for choosing it. After a couple weeks of this, I had smugly taught myself a new bind off and was halfway through it when I noticed that something wasn’t quite right.
You know how, at the beginning of projects knit in the round, after you’ve cast on the requisite number of stitches, they ALL say, without exception: “Join, being careful not to twist”? I knew that. I was careful. But there were a lot of stitches. a LOT of stitches. It was hard to tell whether it was twisted or not, but I did my best. Did I think to check once I had gone far enough to tell a little easier? No. I just assumed that, since I was enjoying the project so much, that I would be fine. So wrong. So, so wrong. Instead, I had knit a freak of geometry that would serve no imagineable purpose. (Though now that I think about it, the finished product might make an excellent noose.)
It was with my confidence in my abilities thus shattered that I headed off for work this morning, to *choke gasp die* lead a knit-along on a beaded scarf, having never done any beaded knitting in all my born days. It didn’t go too badly, as I had practiced a little, and everyone was willing to help each other. We did have some “uhhh… no, do it like this” moments, but everyone left with at least some ability to do what was described in the pattern. As an upside, I’m finally working on a piece of knitting I can show you: