Yesterday I saw through the replay of coverage of the Ladies Figure Skating free skate, and was just so impressed with these ladies. I came away from watching them with the realization that they got where they are through intense athletic training and a whole lot of focus. No mind games, no self-doubt, just focus and determination. Once they got through their program, then they could let go, but up until that moment, they didn’t let anything get into their heads that was going to stop them from executing a series of intensely physical movements with the stamina, endurance, speed, and precision that they had been building over many years of training. After the medal ceremony, I thought to myself, “I could really use some of that focus in my life.”
This morning I woke up, and I was sick of waiting for beads. Friday’s mail had come and gone, leaving no beads behind, and I was starting to get depressed. I decided this was stupid, that I should have enough perspective in life not to get depressed about beads, so I went to spinning class last night and enjoyed myself. But this morning, something snapped. From that moment on, it wasn’t going to matter what it took, how much money, or how little sleep; I was going to get my beads, and I was going to finish my Shipwreck Shawl.
So I left for work, swung by Michaels, and pulled 4 boxes of 6/0 beads off the wall. I have no idea whether 4 boxes will be way too much. I don’t care. I can return the extra boxes, as long as I have enough. Paid for them without even looking at the price. Sat down at work and have knit straight through a class I taught, and helping a bunch of customers, stopping only to acquire some food in a manner as speedy as possible.
No more moping. No more mind games. This is going to happen.
I am not planning on sleeping tonight.